Promised land....

Its not a bright day, gloomy clouds hang over my head.
Its a spring day, and yet everything is dead.
I stare up into the sky wishing i am already gone,
taken to the promised land....

I want the pain to stop,
The tears to go away,
The love it had to vanish,
I wish not to be here anymore.
Hold me by my hand,
Take me to the promised land.

If I gave you time and space and all my faith,
 that one day you will see my face and feel my love,
would you come and take me to the promised land.

 I have gone through life with nothing to look to....
till the day i held your hand.
You gave me a reason to have hope.
A reason, something worth fighting for.
Now i do not want to walk out that door,
Dont want to give up what i never had before...
I do not wish to loose whats been promised
I wanna be taken to to the place where yu exist. My Promised Land.

Au Revoir....

Guys.... I am taking a bit of a sabbatical from this blog! Mainly cos i have my exam from two days later and also cos right now i have a emotional unstability of Norman Bates :)

What is love.....

wat is it about love that must hurt so much? Wi should we feel such emptiness when the one who we thot was our life leaves us? You open your heart and give everything that is your's to them. And then when they leave u have nothing left. Yu are left soulless and hurting.Yu trust them so much with your deepest darkest secrets.Secrets which yu have opened to no one. And they betray that trust and leave you alone standing there on the street, clueless.

But love is when you are pushed, and humiliated and abused and yet yu still have hope for that person to see for what they mean to yu. Yu do not feel anger or remorse.Yu stand silent to the betrayal, to their words and actions that WILL hurt for all they do to you is but a small insignificant to the thought of them leaving yu forever. So even after they are gone yu persist and hope if  not now in future that true love wins, and that yu will have their heart. If and by all means....

The confessions of a broken Heart....

This is the darker side of December,
a month has passed since dat fateful night,
i still see the diamonds in the sky,
which remind me of her eye's,the ones to which i lost my life.

In my corner, I shake within
and let the tears drip from my chin.
for She may have what she craves
and my sobs are left beneath the waves

She has moved far and distant,while i remain in the shadows,
in the darkness of her thought,the memories and the sorrows.
life' got no sense ,No reason to live.
Because of all these twining apprehensions.
these shiny blades and simple fingers,
negotiations of strange hemispheres,
into the mind they play strange games.



xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

When yu say Grow up...............

Throughout our life, we are forced to conform to societal standards, rules and etiquette. As we grow up, everything that is so great about being a child is forced out of us, so that we can be ‘grown up’ and ‘adult’ and progress in life. But why? What if that wasn’t the case? What if we were still allowed dream? What if our imaginations were used just as much as when we were little? Our imagination never dies. It is always capable of the same amount of imagination and convitcion. It is just gradually broken down in the world as we know it. Remember as a child when you truly believed you could catch the moon in your hands if you climbed the highest tree? Or you truly believed that that old tree you saw was a fairy fort?

We as adults forget the pure magic of our imagination. We are too ‘old’ and ‘mature’ to lower ourselves to such levels. But what if we were able to make adult decisions and choices, and work hard, yet act like a child when we needed to? Why is acting like a child a bad thing when children are wonderful: innocent, beautiful, everything that we adults usually are not.

What if we never lost that childish fascination and imagination and wonder and awe, what if we ran until we couldn’t catch our breath, hid behind trees to hide from the red indians which were looking for us, and climbed the tallest tree to survey our kingdom?

Why not?

Till Death Do us apart.....

Lost in my thoughts, hurting in pain,
not knowing the depths i have fallen,
i shall never wake again.
walk away from my life, standing there i heard,
all i wanted to say was that i had loved
and another never will again.
,
In the hallowed halls i call out her name,
not a word in reply, its but a shame,
to hurt in a place in my hollow chest,
for the heart i lost, i will find not again.

Come SOftly

Poems and Poets /   Audre Lorde  /
by:    Audre Lorde
Lived:  
Biography:  



If you come as softly

As wind within the trees

You may hear what I hear

See what sorrow sees.

If you come as lightly

As threading dew

I will take you gladly

Nor ask more of you.

You may sit beside me

Silent as a breath

Only those who stay dead

Shall remember death.

And if you come I will be silent

Nor speak harsh words to you.

I will not ask you why, now.

Or how, or what you do.

We shall sit here, softly

Beneath two different years

And the rich earth between us

Shall drink our tears.

I miss u.....

I am just a sad soul in the dark world,
sorrow and pain - my only companions...

...Dark words, burning tears of my pain,
comforting me in my sorrowful journey...

...Only one thing missing, final oblivion,
sweet death, in your icy arms I wish to sojourn...

“The risk of love is loss, and the price of loss is grief -
But the pain of grief
Is only a shadow
When compared with the pain
Of never risking love.”
                       - Hillary Stanton

In India where something as pure as love has been perverted and misinterpretted that it has but become a profane word. It has been  imbibed into minds that it is corrupt and false right from a tender age. Not a lot have experienced true love. Lust is what prevails in the society which has shun love. The minds of people have been programmed to read love as lust and nothing more than that. And the very few who understand the purity and beauty of it are but branded as fools and rest.Love has created wonders in this country and people from all over the world come here to be awestruck by its beauty but the progeny of that very love has made this feeling so twisted and ugly that it most are afraid of it and some thin of it as a novelty and not as a feeling that jus
confuses you and turns your life upside down.

Help For a laugh

In the last one year posting an eclectic mix of politics, culture, religion, current affairs, the environment and love i have always tried to induce a bit of humour in it. Dark humor albeit humor . The last few months have been an roller coaster of emotions and i have realised that how much of a novelty humor has become. We are in such dire lack of fun of it in our life that we need seperate channels and TV slots of selective scenes to actually bring out a laugh or two.

Wat i dont understand is people have lost the capablity to laugh at anecdotes and situations in their life. Or maybe, jus maybe life has become so dull in this over ambitious and self obsessed world there jus are not enough instances in peoples life to revel and laugh. Its come to the point that people socialise more on the net than in real life leading to real life accidents/incidents to think about. More reasons is that many are so self conscious at wat happens that the would rather keep the whole incident in wraps unless it makes them look good. Come on.... And yest some people are so uptight that they jus cant let their hair down to do something crazy. Blah.... Wat has this world come too.

I am Back :)

Hey there.... After a long Hiatus i am back. It has been very long but i guess i have been to obssessed wid something else that i have not been able to steal my mind away to think about more mundane matters.
its not like yu would have missed me.... But if yu have please let me know. there is No feeling like to know tht yu have been missed. :)    Anyways. for those who know me, yu will know pretty well wats been keeping me away from my beloved blog. So i guess i can be excused.

  Guess i have been a bit too good to write in a blog called "Sorrowborn". But hey.....   A friend once said no one likes a Dying Blog and mines Dead and gone.... :(  
I guess i must try to bring it back now. :)   Wish me luck.

Black

Considered the negation of color, black is conservative, goes well with almost any color. It also has conflicting connotations.It can be serious and conventional. The color black can also be mysterious, sexy, and sophisticated. It has typically symbolized absence, modernity, power,sophistication, formality, elegance, wealth, mystery, style, evil,death, fear, emptiness, darkness, seriousness, conventionality, rebellion, anarchism, unity, sorrow, professionalism, and slimming quality.It has been the most versatile of all the colours denoting a Black is a multi-dimensional color that can mean classic or new. It has an ominous characteristic symbolizing death. Therefore it is used in Western cultures for funerals.It has an air of intelligence (graduation robes), marked with rebellion (the bad guy), shrouded in mystery (space).lot of things as above. Above all it is my favorite colour. And tht is wi it is the colour of my blog too. Now dont ask me wi all of a sudden this sudden rambling abt the color. I dono. i am not thinking i am jus writing.

Well.... This one is not exactly mine,but sure got my head spinning and thought yu might wanna take a look into it.  :)   :)

Call the roller of big cigars,                
The muscular one, and bid him whip
In kitchen cups concupiscent curds.
Let the wenches dawdle in such dress
As they are used to wear, and let the boys
Bring flowers in last month's newspapers.
Let be be finale of seem.
The only emperor is the emperor of ice-cream.
Take from the dresser of deal,
Lacking the three glass knobs, that sheet
On which she embroidered fantails once
And spread it so as to cover her face.
If her horny feet protrude, they come
To show how cold she is, and dumb.
Let the lamp affix its beam.
The only emperor is the emperor of ice-cream.

Vigilante.........

Against opression and tyranny our fore fathers have resorted to the weapon for defending our freedom. From Robin Hood of Nottingham to our very own freedom fighters, have turned to vigilatism to defend our very basic right of existance. Labeled as an act of terrorism or criminal by the  faint hearted, vigilante justice seems to be the need of the hour. In this state of affairs where the corrupt rule, and the system supports, and the level of greed and malfeasance has reached to the very establishments that are sworn to protect us.And to top it all public apathy, the most dangerous of all. This really makes the world a safe place for the corrupt and the criminal. They are beyond the reach of law and the outlaw too. They dominate the ballot,can duck the bullet and jus as easily dodge the law. The higher their position greater their  impunity and immunity. i believe the populace must resort to more drastic measures.The Second Amendment in the US Constitution states " A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed."

i Quote " The liberties of our country, the freedoms of our civil Constitution are worth defending at all hazards; it is our duty to defend them against all attacks domestic or foreign.We have received them as a fair inheritance from our worthy ancestors. They purchased them for us with toil and danger and expense of treasure and blood.  It will bring a mark of everlasting infamy on the present generation – enlightened as it is – if we should suffer them to be wrested from us by violence  without a struggle, or to be cheated out of them by the artifices of designing men."

We all entertain dangerous thoughts, all of which do not become action, fortunately and unfortunately. The provocations of modern life are so dire to us, as individuals and as part of society. Even the primitive man had his primal fears and a resultant predatory instinct. But we are supposed to have evolved since and become ‘civilised’. We talk of such lofty things as rule of law,jurispredence and democracy. But when a  State fails its dependent-subjects and worse, becomes itself their oppressor, will there not be righteous anger against those who personify it? And even more against those who perpetrate it personally?  I wait for the day when the tables turn and true sense of democracy sets in and not only the liberties of law but also the resposibilities that go with it are undersood by the citizen and Apathy dies and he Stands for wat is right.

the Girl

The girl that became the spring rain,

In my life she showered her love,

Undoing her hair, lying down, in her sleep

She becomes the wind,

Blowing the gentle breeze on my face,

She left me in the darkest shadow,

for me to brood in all of my sorrow.

Broken Love

Death is not yet an option.

Though She has turned the other way,

walked away leaving me digging my own grave,

bound to live in the misery of lonliness.

reminiscing in the happy times that were so few,

abiding time in sorrowful stupor,

till the heart beats its last,

her sweet sweet name.

A rendezvous with Goth rock.

Dark, Sad, Melancholy, soul stirring and macabre are some of the words which can be used to describe Goth rock. I am personally a big fan of the gothic subculture and I think it has had a huge effect on my life. But as far as music go I am not prejudiced to any one genre. But if I do make a list of wat I like then I am pretty sure it would rate pretty high.For a lil background info, Goth rock is a musical subgenre of alternative rock that formed during the late 1970s.The Goth culture in itself evolved during the renaissance period where romanticism was at its peak.Some of my favorite bands are Xandria, Atreyu,HIM and Theatre of tragedy. I am not sure if evanescence is a gothic band or not, but I sure love them too. My personal favorite is

'in love with Darkness~Xandria'. The Beauty and the beast sort of vocals jus sweep me away.

P.S: I really recommend Xandria, Chk it out if u have the time.

Violence Unleashed

"Seeing the signs of violence is always very disturbing." A very usual statement by the very sensitive. Not to seem too heartless I dofind them to be a trifle annoying. How do people find it within themselves to harm another person. Or animal. What would Yu do when faced with a life or death situation. Would you rather hold on to your values and die rather? Or be a hypocrite and kill rather then be killed? I eat meat and can divorce myself from the fact that they were alive. I, in my way, contributed to the deaths of those animals.And yet can sleep in peace everynight. Millions other around the world do! Doesnt make me any less human.

Coming back to the subject. Why violence? Wat is the motive to harm or rather kill. I think i have an theory. It's in our nature to kill. Its as natural as eating,walking,sleeping or copulating.Its been programmed into our gene's. For this very reason extreme action,gore and horror fascinates us and and is exploited by almost every film maker. Its jus the cosequence of the action of extreme violence that keeps us in check.of course, if we were civilized or socialized, we'll be seating around talking about it over a drink, Basic, simple. But if could we really get away with it? In a consequnce free environment...... To kill anyone? Anyone at all? Wouldnt you do it. There is bound to be a person who is the subject of our extreme hate. And maybe in some cases the reason to violence is justifiable. Maybe even commendable.

Finishing off with a quote i got some where-

“There are 4 kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.”

P.S: I know this is disjointed but I am a tad disjointed today.

Daydreamer

As Spring turns into Summer,

the butterflies return from their migration,

they fill our imaginations with their beauty and wonder.

they flap their wings to make daydreamers believe,

we make our dreams our reality.

I sat in one of those boring classes in school/coll looking out the window waiting for the professor's to end his droning lectures and then wit my head buried in my hands and in deep thought get transported to a world far far away where my wildest fantasies are satisfied, To a place where the surreal manifestations of my craziest and deepest deires take on shape. Watching this world passing me by all of my life, believing that one day, someone will stop for a second and finally realise that i am not paying attention to what they are whining bout but in my own world where i am Superman, or batman or Ronaldo or Romeo or Bill Gates's closest competitor. I am a daydreamer. And i am jot afraid to admit that.

Under the sweetest flower,

in the garden of bones,

in deep, here I sleep.

On my ground, tears shower,

sorrow, bathing my tombstones,

for me, do not weep.

Overrated: Immortality

Immortality is such an overrated concept.People often wish to be immortal. Science fiction and fantasy stories often toy with the subject. Why would you want to be immortal anyway. That too in the current state of affairs. I would attribute the current need for immortality by majority of the population to the apprehension of death. everyone is afraid of dying. No one wants to go. Now i am not saying i am afraid of dying. But when the needs comes and if it is a good way to go i am ready fo it. Yu my dear friends may wonder wat is a good way to go. For me to die for the country or in th place of a loved one seems to be a good enough reason. Of course others mite have different notions about it. For me as far as i know Immortality is a fools dream.

Religious Terrorist

In a country which prides itself to be the worlds largest democracy and in fact the worlds most populus democracy it is a shame that the freedom to migrate within the national boundaries, to speak out ones mind, to celebrate one's love is is criticized. The financial capital of the country known for its liberal attitude, has under the Far-right "almost terrorist" faction Shiv Sena has resorted to orthodox thinking retarding the countries growth.The ideologies associated with the far right are fascism, Nazism, racial supremicism, religious extremism, and other ultra-nationalist or reactionary ideologies and movements The terms are often used to imply that someone is an extremist.

The Definition from wikipedia almost entirely explain the ideologies of the Shiv Sena in a nut shell. The political party which initially resorted to 'Goondagiri" against tamils and south Indians has shifted their focus to north Indians since the south Indian population grew in number and were able to defend themselves from the racial attacks on them, as the north indians are yet to claim their foothold in Mumbai. But all apart it clearly reflect on the cowardice of the said party which resorts to violence causing civil unrest within the city. This is clearly a case of anti-nationalist sentiments which i presume would be deemed tracherous. What i dont understand is wi the government has not yet classified it a terrorist organisation considering the Shiv Sena supremo bal thackrey in his party newspaper wrote in support of hindu terrorists Sadhvi pragya responsible for the death of a lot of innocent muslim's as they planted a bomb outside a mosque.

Moreover this anti-muslim party goes about bashing abt other peoples personal sentiments. Wat ShahRukh Khan said is his personal opinion. In this democratic country they are protesting to curb a national figure's fundamental right to speech. In fact they are resorting to trashing the cinemas that are screening his latest movie. And after all it was a statement of peace. Wi mix sport and politics. :(

Considering evryone has started laughing right in the orthodox faces of the Shiv Sena i hope all this idiocracy ends pretty soon :D

Lost In tears

Pretending to be happy is but a sad distraction

I rush to give you my silent warning a gentle squeeze of your hand

As I glance at the path i’ve walked, i’ve endured, companionless

My face is overwhelmed with a familar aroma and the duest keeps piling up

I collapse outside of town, land softly

My legs are weary of their endless journey

And fleeting memories run through my head

I see the same profile, hear the same words over and over

Like the girl who asked me “isn’t life so sad when all you do is live?”

You’re still careless, young and helpless…

Disapperaing into a hollow void

Now haveing witnessed sadness you should never have seen

Crying tears that should have remained dry

We may not be tough enough to live on truth alone,but you know, we dont need to be

Solar Eclipse 2010

Hey :)

If you have still not been alerted by the news (which is highly unlikely) on the 2010 Annular solar eclipse, here we go again.Today is the day you will witness the longest solar eclipse of this century take place. The annular solar eclipse would be visible in most parts of India but only the southern fringes of the country will see it as an Annular eclipse. For the rest of the country, it would be a partial solar eclipse. I bet all of yu are as excited as i am about the solar eclipse.it was really crazy today.It was all over the news.Now somehow till now i have never been in a zone of a total eclipse and i am not letting this chance pass. Ofcourse yu cant see it with the naked eye.Guess wat i did! i Made smoked glass. Check out the pics and enjoy. :)

Welcome 2010

HeY.... First of all,Happy New Year. Sorry Abt being so late but things have not been going according to plan. But i think its all good in a wierd sort of way.I Jus figured out a lot of things about some people i trusted in,unfortunately its not something good.But better late then never eh?

But enough whineing.... I jus wanted to talk abt something i realised recently. Nothing is thicker then blood. No how much ever yu trust the people you do not share a blood relation with,they are eventually gonna stab yu in the back. Ofcourse there might be some cases where its not but mostly it is so. Jus a warning.

Guys....... Have fun in the new year.